Digital brain decay
The internet is making us delusional
I was scrolling through TikTok, just looking for inspiration, and I stumbled on this girl picking apart all the weird relationship advice floating around. You know the type, the ones that sound powerful in a tweet but doesn’t hold up in real life.
She started with “leave rent-free in their heads.”
Then tore it down.
Instead of obsessing over someone who thinks about you 24/7, why not find a partner who actually has a life? Someone who adds to yours instead of revolving around it?
And then came the classic: “All men cheat.”
Her response? Maybe your father and your ex were dusties, but that doesn’t make it universal. The brain clings to what it believes, so if you expect disappointment, you’ll get it.
She went on: “Make them obsessed with you.”
But obsession isn’t love. It’s instability wrapped in an ego boost. The highs are thrilling, sure, but do you really want a relationship built on push-and-pull dynamics, waiting for the next emotional rollercoaster?
Then, the last one: “I can do it alone.”
Can you? Maybe alone from the poor connections you’ve chosen. But real independence isn’t isolation. Your nervous system needs other people to function, to thrive. Even the most self-sufficient person needs community.
And I just sat there, phone in hand, thinking: The internet has ruined us. The Brain Rot is Real
We don’t even know what a healthy relationship looks like anymore.
We enter relationships thinking, What can I get? instead of How can I build? We chase benefits, not bonds. We forget that relationships aren’t just transactions but living, breathing things that require care, effort, and, God forbid, emotional responsibility.
And the worst part? We don’t even realize it.
Remember when Shera seven blew up? Oh my days.
At first, I hated the whole “How to be feminine, how to make men obsessed with you” discourse. Then, like any other human being constantly fed the same thing on their FYP, I started leaning in.
Maybe she had a point? Maybe there was some hidden truth to all this?
And then one day, I snapped out of it.
Wait, why the hell was I listening to a woman teaching me how to appeal to a man for financial benefits? Why was this even a thing? Why does someone like this have such a massive platform, and why are people taking notes like it’s a university course?
We talk about de-centering men all the time, but somehow, everything still revolves around them. Are we hypocrites, or are we just too deep in the cycle to see it?
And let’s not even get started on the manipulation playbooks.
I kid you not, there are actual e-books, e-books, being sold on how to manipulate men. How to be feminine enough to be chosen. How to talk in a way that makes a man want to provide for you.
You mean to tell me there are grown women out here waking up, brushing their teeth, making their morning coffee, and thinking, Let me spend my day learning how to tweak my voice to sound more feminine so a man can like me?
Do you not have courses to finish? Jobs to apply for? Hobbies? A life?
And then there’s this main character shit.
Nobody is saying don’t be the main character of your own life. You should be. But being the main character doesn’t mean living in a world where you’re always right and everyone else is the problem.
This new, rebranded version of self-love is just entitlement wrapped in aesthetics. It’s not self-love; it’s self-centeredness. The kind that makes you cut off people at the slightest inconvenience, the kind that makes you believe you’re exempt from accountability.
And this is why relationships—romantic, platonic, familial—are crumbling.
Because we expect people to read our minds.
You’re mad at someone, but you don’t tell them. Instead, you wait. You sulk. You let resentment build. And when they don’t magically figure it out, you decide they don’t care.
Do you know how insane that is?
People come from different backgrounds, with different ways of expressing themselves. Some grew up in homes where emotions were locked away, where silence was a survival mechanism. Others never had to guess how someone felt because they were raised in families that talked.
And yet, we refuse to extend grace.
We don’t stop to think: Maybe they don’t know how to communicate because no one ever taught them.
We don’t ask: How can I help us bridge this gap?
Instead, we just leave. Because that’s easier than doing the work.
We want deep relationships, but we don’t want to do the deep work.
The Real Reason We’re So Afraid?
Vulnerability.
That’s it. That’s the thing we’re all running from.
Because being vulnerable means giving someone the power to hurt you. It means opening up, laying yourself bare, and risking rejection. And our generation? We don’t do that.
We ghost instead of communicate. We sabotage before we get attached. We convince ourselves we don’t care so we never have to admit that we do.
And then, when we lose something good, we pretend we never wanted it in the first place.
The internet has taught us to be cold. Detached. Untouchable.
But in the end, we’re only hurting ourselves.
If you’d like to leave a tip, it would mean the world to me. It’s just another way to show your support, and I’d appreciate it deeply.